azaelas

      We have lived in our house over 15 years now.  The front landscaping was a hodge podge of shrubs when we moved here.  At some point I decieded I'd like to grow white azaelas as a nice backdrop for other flowers-and I love azaelas.  There were several in various colors already growing here.  So over the years, I'd plant a few and most of them died.  I was attempting the one bush at a time landscape plan.  After years of this I stopped and took notice of all my failures.  This fall I took a soil sample to the extension agent and told him what I wanted to do.  I also consulted with a landscaper about an overall plan.  I read several books about growing azaelas.  Then I used the tiller and ammended the soil.  I purchased 4 large white azaelas.  Then I added soaker hoses and an automatic watering system.  I also added lots of pine needle mulch.  At this point I am 100% committed.  Time will tell if I'm successful but I know I'm at least doing all I can.  I'm also going to add frequent attention. 

Fall and Halloween

         This week we have watched the leaves start to fall in the front yard.  There's been a huge harvest moon.  This really is my favorite time of year.  Fall is more colorful than spring and it signals the start of winter and the rest season.  Most of the work has been done and the harvest is in or close to being in.  Spring and summer are so labor intensive that I look forward to a break. Fall is the time that you put plants to bed for the winter.   I love the cooler nights and the colors of fall.  Pumpkins, apples and hearty soups are some of my favorite foods.
      Then there's the most fascinating holiday- Halloween.  Who is not intrigued or scared some by the thought of death?  I reverence those that have gone before me.  I want to remember them and celebrate their lives.  Catholics know this really is the origin of Halloween.  Cemetaries should be special places.  They fascinate me.  Death and what lies beyond really is the big mystery, isn't it?  (Maybe the existence of alien life forms is the number 1 mystery according to Hollywood?)  Death is something that we all are touched by eventually.  It's the mystery we all have to come to grips with ourselves.  I feel that Halloween in some small part helps us to do this. 

Fear

   Recently I've been thinking about fear.  It can be a huge hindrance.  My oldest daughter recently spent two months overseas.  I kept having nightmares about obstacles she could face.  I admired her gumption to go but several people commented that they could never do such a thing.  It seems that our fears get larger as we get older, so maybe we had best have our adventures when we're young.
   Everyone in my family has a fear of the water.  None of us can swim.  I have found out that my dad nearly drowned as a young man and told my mother not to take us near the water.  So we all have this fear of the water, due to a lack of exposure I guess.  And from someone who has had swimming lessons, it can be a strong fear.  We can inherit fears from our parents in this way.  Parents can also help you face and overcome your fears.  It's hard as a parent to watch your children do things that scare you, but it can be done. 
   In healthcare, I see alot of anxiety.  It can be debiliatating.  We frequently make our own cages and limit ourselves.  I  wonder what I could accomplish if I didn't let fear get in my way.  And heaven help me from passing on my fears to my children.   We all need to just go boldly out into the world trusting in the goodness that is all around us.